So here's what I ended up with:
After that I wanted to do a more complex one. But I've been neglecting my letter-writing, so I decided I'd kill two birds with one stone and make a flowchart tailored to someone so I could mail it to them. And here's that end-product:
I threw it up on /r/funnycharts, got some amusing comments.
Here's what I'm looking at right now: